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Hello!
I am back!

For now, I am going to put some poetry here, some poems I have written, some poems that really make me stand up and realize that I am truly a poet because I am quite proud of these works.



Square Me In A Round Hole

There’s a hope in my pocket
But do not tell no one,
I put it there last year
But what I got is none
Of the return for my investment,
So it sits there still,
But now it’s faded
Its colours are jaded
And I find it gives no thrill.

There’s a hole in my heart
And everything is leaking,
You can see right inside
But there is to be no peeking.

There’s a home in my mind
And my future rests on it,
With a warm and roaring fire
And in front of it she sits;
I cannot touch her yet
Or invade her space,
Yet I can see her sitting there, with me,
But I cannot see her face.

And if not for the faded, jaded hope
That in my pocket rusts,
And the hole in my heart
Where the blood congeals and crusts,
Then maybe I would truly be happy
And have such great belief,
Instead
I am just me.
Take me, or leave me -
Just me.


August 3, 2009









Haley Called, But The Operator Cannot Connect


Haley called,
The Comet’s warmed up,
Time to burn some rubber
And take this town.
You and me were gonna
Paint it red,
Nothing between us
Ever left unsaid,
Then you burned bright in
A different direction,
Left me with a handful of
Circumspection;
You winked like a star and
Disappeared from sight,
And Haley never called for me again.


July 26th, 2009








Drawing Me Out


Paper tiger,
All I feel like is a
Paper tiger,
I roar but I have no bite,
I put on my strong face
But I’m scared;
Scared of loneliness,
Scared of defeat,
Scared of trying,
And mainly scared of me.
I am scared to discover who I am
Because I fear I may like me
Even less
Than I do now.
It’s silly, I know,
But I have no eraser for my fears,
So all I can do is
Draw a tiger over them
On my sheet of graduated sanity
That is my life.
I am a paper tiger
And that, for now, will have to be alright.

I say I am okay,
I pretend I am alright,
But I am a broken compass
Lost into this night.
I try to make believe
That I am somebody I want to be,
I need to be,
I try to show some strength,
To remind myself that deep within
There is some strongness in me,
Even though I do not always feel it;
Sometimes, I succeed for a time,
But always what happens
Is she (the mistress bitch)
She bites me from behind,
And now I have to sit down alone
To hide this paper cut from which I can’t atone.

I am a paper tiger,
I roar but have no bite,
I am a paper tiger,
And that,
For now,
Just has to be alright.
It is all that I have right now,
So that has got to be alright...
Paper tiger,
Paper tiger is me.
Draw me, I roar.
Fold me, I cry.
Colour me weary,
Paper tiger am I.



August 10th 2009








I Tarry, Until You

No breath to breathe when you aren’t near
No sweet arms to hold me
It’s only at night that I find your embrace
In the fleeting dreams that loneliness sold me

And out of dreams your heart has spoke
Sending a random message to my mind
So in the waking hours I work my magic
Spells to conjure, conjoin, and find

Where you are I long to be
Who you are I long to see
Where you’ve been is all my mind sees
And I tarry with these visions of you


March 7th, 2010








Left For Heart-Dead

The curse of humility,
The kiss of chastity,
The end of longevity,
Who would better know of these
Than the one whose own heart deceived him
With a thousand knives of unseen fury,
Blood-filled vision gets a little blurry,
Words of hope and love only come out slurry,
And loneliness is my only companion left.

April 27th, 2010








Naked


I’m starting to feel
All beat down and naked,
Shambles and shamed in a field of plain.
Serenity might just be
A lack of originality in
Expressing my numbness.
All is insane;
Life can be so numb and lame.
I don’t feel good and I don’t feel
Right, somehow
Everything I once clinged to
Is outta my sight,
And I have a little bit of
Panicked fright.
This would be so pleasant and so alright,
If only this were just words and
Not
My present reality.

I spin in a whirlpool,
Boredom has overtaken my life
And I take little pleasure in anything anymore...
And I do not like it.

Naked and cold,
Naked and old,
Nary a stitch to be found,
My misery kills me without a whimpering sound,
Leaves me staked out for the jackals...
If I were a wary wolf, I would have long ago raised
My hackles.

There is not too much more that I would say.
Naked I stand,
Waiting for approval,
Waiting
For love,
Waiting for you.

Naked, is how I feel.

Jan 12th, 2010








Sea Of Less

Drowning
I come up for air
It’s hard to die silent
While everyone stares


January 31st, 2010








The Ball That Broke My World

Sand beneath my toes
Sand beneath my toes
Sun-bleached, broken, stark-white bones
Rib cage, skull, seagulls and crows

Tattered remnants of fabric so black
Standard set upright by footprint tracks
Bonfire of timbers, signal to the gods
Resting on sand, of food there is lack

Into the depths my shipmates did fall
Blood and drowning their deaths did not stall
Merciless waves washed me up alone
All because of one well-placed cannonball

March 8th, 2010







Unlovely Life

Life is precious, life is quick,
You stole mine from me in a way so slick,
Caged my heart, drained my blood,
Sunk my feet deep into the mud
Of black morass and a bleak despair;
My haunted eyes see nothing where once saw fair.

You;
You don’t know what you did to me,
Nor do you care to.
And I, I do not even know
Just what you did inside of me,
But I know that where once life blossomed,
Now there is only this living death.

All joy, stifled,
All mirth, muffled,
All that you brought
You stole back
And took much more besides;
Nothing that resembles life
Remains here on the inside.

My oh my,
You killed me good,
And you do not even give a
Damn.
Where once you were the sunshine to me,
You have become the plunging and severing knife...
All I know and see now that you are heartlessly gone
Is my own (empty, dead) unlovely life.


January 21st, 2010







Windowpane


The exhilarating thrill is dead and gone,
Joy once lived where black now spawns,
My heart still sometimes throbs with a
Hurt that’s insane,
When I can’t believe the scene from my
Windowpane.

I can’t believe, I can’t receive
What it is I see from my windowpane;
Is not what I want, memories still haunt,
My back-lit stained-glass window pain.

Seated I stare, seated I dare
To try to recapture
The thrilling rush and rapture,
But nothing is quite so factual
As the dead-end scenery of what is actually
There,
Nothing that excited like anticipation of
Seeing your face, so fair.

My windowpane betrays me,
My heart so sharp that it filets me,
Burdened with the weight of what once was
I sit and stare and see that my future is a bust.

The exhilarating thrill is dead and gone,
Joy once lived where black now spawns,
My heart still sometimes throbs with a
Hurt that’s insane,
When I can’t believe the scene from my
Windowpane.

Once I waited for you, day by day,
Gazing outside and waiting to see
You,
On the off chance that you might come by
Like you did before;
I gaze at places where you walked and you talked
With this man, leading my heart astray,
And all the colours turn to gray
In this life of mine.

I do not like the scene
I see through my windows now,
Though once it was the scene that gave me hope,
Gave me life.
Now that view is seen through bars,
The bars you erected around me
When you killed me with your (false, fake, unreal, cruel) love.
You took everything that was right, and stabbed it repeatedly
Until it was a bloody smear upon my window pain...

My heart still sometimes throbs with a
Hurt that’s insane,
When I can’t believe,
When I can’t receive,
When I am constantly saddened by
The scene, the scene from my
Windowpane.



January 20th, 2010






I'm alive, and glad to be back online. We'll talk again soon, okay?