The Cost of Time Travel

Do you have to know how to give love before you can receive love, or do you have to be able to receive love before you can give love?

When I consider my life, I realize that I am not that much different after all from others that I know; I am just another lonely soul who does not know what love is.

I find that I tend to fight to be in control of my emotions, to rule over them. I guess that I figure that it is better to be in control of something, rather than to feel like I am out of control, like life is beyond my control. Like most other people in this world, my life boils down to a power struggle; I fight for control of the uncontrollable. And I generally lose. Pretty much every time. But I go on fighting. I fight for control, because it is all that I know. Doesn’t matter that it doesn’t work. Doesn’t matter that I fail. Doesn’t matter that there must be a better way than this. I just struggle on.

Back around the mountain again. 40 years of desert traveling, until I die. When will I learn?