nuts

My daily devotional got me instantly contemplative, and God spoke to me.


September 7
We Need a Great Savior

[Peter] shouted, “Lord, save me!” Immediately Jesus reached out his hand and caught Peter.
Matthew 14:30-31 (NCV)

We come to Christ in an hour of deep need. We abandon the boat of good works. . . .We realize, like Peter, that spanning the gap between us and Jesus is a feat too great for our feet. So we beg for help. Hear his voice. And step out in fear, hoping that our little faith will be enough. . . .

Faith is a desperate dive out of the sinking boat of human effort and a prayer that God will be there to pull us out of the water. Paul wrote about this kind of faith . . . :

"For it is by grace you have been saved, through faith--and this not from yourselves, it is the gift of God--not by works, so that no one can boast" (Eph. 2:8-9 NIV).




I get it, Lord.

I thought I was having faith, and I was; but faith in WHAT? When I examine, I know the answer - faith in myself. I had faith that You would enable me to be able to accomplish things that benefitted myself and glorified myself.

I was wrong. I am so sorry, Lord.

Here then is the answer I have been searching so long now for; right here, laid out in front of me. This is why things did not work out as I thought they would.

I had faith; faith that I could cause her to love me, faith that my friendship would enable me to lead her to Christ, faith that I was the only one who could accomplish these things in her.

I had faith in me.

In so doing, I became faithless. I became all about me, all about my wants, and making (trying to make) God line up with my desires.

Meanwhile, God was all about using these experiences to make me need Him more, to draw me closer to Him, and to change me within.

As I have been learning lately, change hurts. Change happens in great upheaval and stress in life. God uses these things, even allows them, to change us within.

Now, I have my answer. I have no more reason to question my past, and now I need to allow God to make the changes in me (as He has been slowly doing) that allow me to move on in Him. My past is behind me, and my future is in His eyes and His hands. All I need to do is look to Him.
Truly, it is all about Jesus.

Might be a good time to admit, I went to church this Sunday, for the first time in about a year. It was "alright". But it wasn't about me, so much as it was about being obedient and cultivating good habits in my life.

God is love. So, let Your love rain down upon my head, Lord.